Sailor Scout Auditions
by ChibiPrincessKat
Summary: Sailor Moon is looking for some new Sailor Scouts. Who knows who will try out and what will happen...


Author's Note-Yes...I DO own Sailor Moon! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! j/k, of course I don't. Duh.  
  
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Director - Sailor Moon, word is that ratings are going down and kids aren't watching as much Sailor Moon  
as usual. We have run out of ideas so we came to you.  
Sailor Mars - Not the smartest choice, if u ask me.  
Sailor Moon - Well, nobody asked u, REI! I suggest consulfing Mercury.  
Sailor Mercury - It's consulting, Serena.  
Sailor Moon - That's what I said.  
Director, Sailor Mars, Sailor Mercury, Sailor Venus, and Sailor Jupiter - iShe's hopeless.../i  
Sailor Mercury - Anyways, I think that a decrease in viewers has to do with...  
Sailor Mars - Serena's stupidity.  
Sailor Moon - I resent that!  
Sailor Mercury - boredom.  
Sailor Venus - Boredom? How can a bunch of girls in short skirts and high heels be boring?  
Sailor Mercury - The solution is simple. We should add something new!  
Director - How do u suggest we do that?  
Sailor Jupiter - How about a new Sailor Scout?  
Sailor Mars - That's a great idea! Why don't we also replace Sailor Moon with ME as leader?  
Sailor Moon - Why do you always pick on me?  
Sailor Mars - Because you're a meatball brain.  
Sailor Moon - Oh, I see...HEY!!!  
Sailor Mercury - I think new Sailor Scouts are a great idea, Jupiter.  
Sailor Jupiter - Thank you.  
Director - How will we find new Sailor Scouts?  
Sailor Moon - We can hold auditions! I'll pick the new scouts since iI/i am the leader.  
Director - That's a great idea!  
Sailor Mars - I am speechless. Meatball Head had a good idea.  
Later that day...  
Director - Okay, Sailor Moon, we are now going to start the auditions, are you ready?  
Sailor Moon - Yep!  
Director - *to himself* I must be out of my mind...  
Sailor Moon - Send them in!  
A girl w/ sandy blonde hair, blue eyes, and two little braids tied in the back walked up to Sailor Moon.  
Girl - I believe I am first.  
Sailor Moon - Umm...What now?  
Director - Ask for her name! *to himself* I must REALLY be out of my mind...  
Sailor Moon - Name?  
Girl - Relena Peacecraft  
Sailor Moon - Who?  
Relena - Relena Pea...  
Sailor Moon - Oh, okay, I thought you said you name was Rei Hinocraft.  
Relena - Ummm...okaaay...  
Sailor Moon - Alright, now, what do u want to be?  
Relena - Why, a foreign minister, of course.  
Sailor Moon - I was talking about what sailor scout.  
Relena - Well, Sailor Peacecraft would be nice, or Sailor Colony, or Sailor Relena, or...  
Sailor Moon - *tunes out Relena's voice and dreams she is eating a hot cinamon bun*  
Relena - or Sailor...*notices Sailor Moon is not listening* Is that Tuxedo Mask?  
Sailor Moon - WHERE?  
Relena - Nevermind.  
Sailor Moon - Oh poo.  
Relena - So, can I transform, now?  
Sailor Moon - What? Oh yeah, sure. *hands Relena a transformation pen* Just yell out some sort of name.  
Relena - Okay, sounds easy! *holds up t.p. (no not toilet paper, transformation pen)* Umm...World Peace  
Power!!!  
Sailor Moon - *yawns* Boring!  
Relena - *transforms into a national representative* Okay, well, I'm off to the United Nations HQ! We are   
discussing issues in the Middle East, maybe Quatre will be there.  
Sailor Moon - Umm...Yeaaah...  
Sailor World Peace - Bye! Peace out! *does the peace sign and leaves*  
Sailor Moon - NEXT!  
Director - *runs over from his chair* Where is she going?  
Sailor Moon - United Nations.  
Director - Oh, a pacifist, huh?  
Sailor Moon - Yep...  
Director - Okay, well, NEXT!  
Another girl walks in, this one was tall and thin like Relen...Sailor World Peace. She had   
shoulder-length brown hair and freckles.  
Girl - Hello.  
Sailor Moon - Hi  
Girl - Hey  
Sailor Moon - Hiya  
Girl - Howdy  
Sailor Moon - Hola  
Girl - Aloha  
Sailor Moon - Konnichi Wa  
Girl - Bonjour  
Sailor Moon - ENOUGH! Name?  
Girl - Katie  
Sailor Moon - Now, who do you...  
Katie - Star Crystal Power! *transforms* I am Sailor Star! Protector of the stars and I will   
not allow evil to conquer!  
From backstage, Sailor Mars - Oh, she's good.  
Sailor Moon - Hey! You're not allowed to do that!  
Sailor Star - I can do anything, I'm the author.  
Sailor Moon - grrrr...  
Sailor Star - Wanna see my attack?  
Sailor Moon - *frustrated* not really...  
Sailor Star - SHOOTING STAR...  
Sailor Moon - Uh oh...  
Sailor Star - ATTACK!!!!!!  
A blazing ball of light is hurled at Sailor Moon, who tries to dodge it, but can't.  
Sailor Moon - Oooh! Ouch! Ahhh! Oh! The pain! YOU!!! *points at Sailor Star* You ruined my   
Sailor outfit!  
Sailor Star - Chill, Moon-face. *snaps fingers and Sailor Moon's costume is magically   
restored to new, along w/ her hair*  
Sailor Star - Okay, well, I've got to finish writing this fic, C*ya!  
Sailor Moon - *grumbles* NEXT!  
This time, a girl w/ long purple hair and red eyes and a girl w/ spiky blue hair and yellow  
eyes come in, dragging behind them a boy with short black hair screaming "HELP ME!"  
Purple-haired Girl - I am Princess Ayeka  
Blue-haired girl - And I am Ryoko  
Both of them - And this is Tenchi! *both hold up Tenchi by one of his arms to show to Sailor  
Moon* Hey! Grrrr...  
The two stare at each other why sparks fly from their eyes.  
Sailor Moon - Oh boy...Who are u gonna be?  
Ayeka - I am going to be Sailor Jurai!  
Ryoko - And I am going to be Sailor Space Pirate  
Both - And he will be Tenchi Mask! *growl at each other and sparks fly again*  
Sailor Moon - I see. *hands both girls a t.p. and tells them what to do*  
Ayeka - Sounds easy.  
Ryoko - Well, it will be for me, but I don't think you can handle it.  
Ayeka - Why, YOU! *holds up t.p.* Jurain Power!  
Ryoko - Space Pirate Power!  
*both transform*  
Sailor Jurain - *wooden blocks appear around her* Jurai Power ATTACK!  
Sailor Space Pirate - *shoots orange beams at Sailor Jurain* Space Pirate Flash!  
Both girls use shields and are not damaged by each other's attack, but once again, Sailor   
Moon involuntarily tests their powers.  
Sailor Star - *pops out of thin air* Why do I have to do everything? *snaps fingers and   
Sailor Moon's clothes go back to normal*  
Sailor Jurai - Azaka! Kamidake!   
A and K - Yes, ma'am!  
Sailor Jurai - *places hands on the two giant wood-blocks* Fire!  
Sailor Space Pirate - Ha! Missed! *flies into the air* Can't catch me!  
Sailor Jurai - Oh really...*grabs Tenchi and hops on Azaka* Let's go!  
Azaka - Yes, Princess. *takes off into air w/ Kamdake close behind*  
Tenchi - Help me!  
Sailor Moon - I'm scared to say next...  
(Here I thought about having Pretty Sammy come along and then end up in court with Sailor  
Moon for copying the whole 'magical girls' idea, but decided I wanted this to be a SHORT   
fic. -Sailor Star [Katie])  
A girl walks up to Sailor Moon and politely introduces herself.  
Girl - Hello, I'm Miaka. I was looking for the library and I think I'm lost.  
Sailor Moon - Name something you like?  
Miaka - Why, that's easy! Tamahome!  
Sailor Moon - Tamawho?  
Miaka - Well, besides him, I like to eat!  
Sailor Moon - Really? Me too!  
Miaka - Wow! Cool! I'm hungry!  
Sailor Moon - Yeah, I'm always hungry, I'm a pig!  
Miaka - And yet, you look great!  
Sailor Moon - Thanks, you too! Will you do me a favor?  
Miaka - Sure. What?  
Sailor Moon - Here *hands Miaka a red transformation pen*  
From backstage, Sailor Mars - She wouldn't...  
Sailor Moon - Yell 'Mars Planet Power!'  
Miaka - Alright. MARS PLANET POWER!!! *transforms into Sailor Mars*  
From backstage, Sailor Mars - SHE DID!  
Sailor Jupiter - She's not bad...  
Sailor Moon - Perfect! Oh, Mr. Director!  
Sailor Mars - *runs onstage* How could you???  
Sailor Moon - Because you are mean, and snobby, and rude and...uh...mean!  
Men wearing body guard uniforms come and start to drag Sailor Mars away.  
Sailor Mars - You'll hear from my Lawyer!!!  
Sailor Moon - Uh huh.  
Sailor Mars - Mars Celestial Fire SURROUND!  
The body guards already predicted this situation and are wearing fire-proof clothes.  
Sailor Mars - DARNIT!  
Sailor Moon - Tough luck. *puts arm around Miak...Sailor Mars* Welcome to the Scouts!  
Sailor Mars/Miaka - But I was just looking for the library.  
Sailor Moon - Eh, you can go there anytime w/ Mercury.  
Sailor Mars/Miaka - Great! This sounds like fun! *walks backstage*  
Sailor Moon - Next!  
Two girls walk in, both look around 16. The taller one of the two had short, blonde hair  
and the other had blue-green, wavy hair.  
Sailor Moon - Aren't you two a bit old?  
*both girls look at each other* No.  
Sailor Moon - Umm...okaaay...Names?  
Tall blonde - Haruka  
Wavy-haired girl - Michiru  
Sailor Moon - Now, I want you to...  
Haruka - *pulls out yellow transformation pen* URANUS PLANET POWER!  
Michiru - *pulls out teal transformation pen* NEPTUNE PLANET POWER!  
Both transform.  
Sailor Moon - Wow. You two don't know a Katie the author, do you?  
Sailor Uranus - Nope.  
Sailor Neptune - No.  
From backstage, Sailor Venus - Woah! That really hot guy just transformed into a sailor   
scout!  
Sailor Jupiter - Really? Where?  
Back onstage, Director - PERFECT! You two get the job! We have our new Sailor Scouts, but   
those names! They have to go! *points to Michiru* How about Michelle, instead?  
Sailor Neptune - I don't have a problem with that.  
Director - *points to Haruka* How about Heather?  
Sailor Uranus - How about no?  
Director - Missy?  
Sailor Uranus - No.  
Director - Tara?  
Sailor Uranus - No way.  
Sailor Neptune - How about Amara?  
Sailor Uranus - Sounds fine.  
Director - Okaaaay...  
Sailor Moon - Aren't they a bit old?  
Director, Sailor Uranus, and Sailor Neptune - No.  
Sailor Moon - Fine.  
Director - I can see it, now! We'll call it Sailor Moon S! It'll be fabulous! All we need is  
some sort of Enemy...hmm...a Doctor! And we need some more Sailor Scouts! The other planets,  
maybe, Oh! And one of the Sailor Scouts will be bad!  
Sailor Moon - Bad?  
Director - Well, possesed, then.  
Sailor Moon - Oh, like that's any better...  
Sailor Neptune - Does everybody get their names changed?  
Sailor Moon - I used to be Usagi.  
Director - Ooh! And Rini! Rini will be a Sailor Scout, too!  
Sailor Moon - *sighs* We've got a weird season ahead...  
Sailor Uranus - We must find the Messiah.  
Sailor Neptune - Yes.  
Sailor Moon - Very weird...  
The End  
Was it funny? Or I am just screwed up in the head? The world may never know...  
-Katie (Sailor Star *winks*)  
  
  



End file.
